The Acorn, Purpose, and Our Interconnectedness

I switched from psychotherapy to coaching because it is forward focused. Coaching is an amazing way of working with people I’ve found. And I like to use a very simple

 metaphor for coaching and that’s the acorn metaphor, which I know you all probably know. But the important thing is that you don’t have to teach an acorn how to become an oak tree.

And coaching honors that principle: that the coach doesn’t have the answers, and we don’t have to teach people how they should or could be. But what coaching does is draw out, through coaching and asking the right questions, the inherent wisdom in the individual. So all the answers lie within.

And I’ve tried this out because I work with socially excluded teenagers. And it works. Even they 

have the answers to their own questions and dilemmas.

And this isn’t a new concept. Aristotle talked about entelechy, which he said there is a pattern in each one of us for becoming who we are meant to be. And in the East they talk about Dharma, that there is an ideal blueprint inside each one of us. And coaching is the most amazing way to draw this out of individuals.

I also like coaching because it’s not just about the individual. Coaching is systemic and it recognizes our fundamental interconnectedness, and how we are not isolated individuals, but we are part of a larger whole.

And I’m going to take a risk — Kai gave me permission — to do a little process with you, if you’re willing. If you’re not willing, you don’t have to. It’s about perception and how we see each other.

And I’d like to invite you to have several perceptions as you look around at all the other people here. And you too. It’s four stages, and the first one is rather uncomfortable, but please be willing to be uncomfortable for 30 seconds.

So, I invite you to just look around at all the people here.

These people are a problem.

Look at how we all can change and be better and be bigger. These people are really a problem. I know you would never do that intentionally anyway. But let’s move on.

Let’s move on to another perception that says: look around. Louder? You can’t hear me? Okay. Oh, I’m sorry. Did you hear the first perception? These people are a problem. So I better talk really loud, huh? So can you hear me now?

Okay, so the second perception I’d like to invite you to is to look around at each other and say to yourself:

These people are unique individuals who have a problem.

Do you hear that? Good. So just for a moment, everybody here is a unique individual who has a problem. Okay. Not bad, huh? Much easier than the first one.

The third one, though, is I invite you to look around at each other from the perception that says:

This person has a purpose in life and has challenges and obstacles to meet in order to fulfill their purpose.

These people have a purpose in life, and they have challenges and obstacles to meet in order to fulfill their purpose.

Not bad, huh? A little better? We’re getting better as we go along?

And then finally, the last perception is:

These people have a purpose in life that is a part of a larger plan and overall scheme of the universe.

Just try that out. What’s it like to look at other people? Everyone has a purpose in life that’s a part of a greater unknowable scheme.

And how does that feel? I see people nodding. Do you want to turn to your neighbor and just say what that was like for you?

“Inspiring.”
“Yeah.”
“I feel way more connected to people.”
“Yeah.”
“We got it on deck.”

But the last thing I want to say really is that every once in a while, in my experience, someone comes along that has an incredible calling, and vision, and passion. And that person is Kai.

But it’s not just the vision and the passion and the calling. It’s also possessing the skills and the capacity to make that vision real. And what Kai, what you’ve done in such a short period of time, takes people — it took me 30 years to do that, to achieve that much.

And I call what Kai is doing visionary common sense, actually.

And so let’s all bless Treehouse Coaching. Let’s carry it in our hearts and let’s visualize it as a successful, transformative, society-changing, people-changing initiative.

This speech was given by Diana Whitmore at the Stichting Treehouse Coaching Launch Event on May 15th, 2026.